Reaching Out…

Friendship neglected
Doesn’t die, but lies dormant,
Waiting for sunshine.
Have you ever had a friendship kind of fizzle? No real reason, but one, or both of you, simply stopped watering it. And then you realize 6, 12 months later that it has gone?

What do you do?

You reach out. Or rather, I reached out. A few weeks ago.  I felt bad that I hadn’t returned a call a million years ago and one of her Facebook postings brought the guilt roaring back. Ouch. So I swallowed (what’s the worse that can happen!?!?) and reached out. She reached back. (Phew!) Then we had a great phone conversation.

The funny part? She thought she had been the one to retreat. And I insisted that my life had just been so busy and narrow (by choice) and the kids and the work and although not a good excuse, it was a reason so it wasn’t you it was me… We both laughed and moved on.

I think I could be a better friend. I come from a long line of women who make great friends but we don’t always pay consistent attention to them. We come in and out of them, happily picking up where we left off, never worried that the “leaving off” might not suit some people.  Do I not want the closeness?   Am I lazy and unable to take the time to invest?  No, I think I just forget that the investment is easy and has a fabulous rate of return.  Then why does it seem to work with some friends and not with others? Clearly, I’m broken… it’s all my fault. Actually, I’m probably more normal than I think I am.

Well, that call was a wonderful reminder. I definitely got something from the reconnection. I think she did too.  It doesn’t take a lot of water and sunshine to keep a friendship healthy and growing. Yes, it does take some attention, but less than you think. And as in most things, you get what you give, and usually more in return.

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